Ares jokes
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?
They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.
Why are the twin towers sad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza and got a plane!
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.
Yo mama jokes are so old, like your mom.
Mickey: I want a divorce!
Minney: Are you fricking crazy?
Mickey: No, I'm fricking Daisy!
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
My two moods are “I can’t believe I get to be a person” and “I can’t believe I have to be a person.”
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? The front desk always asks, “Where are your parents?”
Why are so many people making fun of people with wheelchairs?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
Me: What are we doing in HPE?
Friend: Fitness.
Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.
You're a copycat from Ballarat You smell like a rat, you wear a hat and you are shaped like a baseball bat.
Song by John Rizk
How are the faster readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they read 80 stories in 10 seconds.
At school I am always called emo.
Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.
My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.
You are so hairy, you starred in Donkey Kong before!
Little Johnny: Dad, why are you rubbing the horse's chest and butt?
Dad: I want to see if it's good enough to buy.
Little Johnny: I think Uncle Joe wants to buy Mom.
Why are midgets constantly thirsty?
They can't reach the drinking fountains.
Bro, I was told that "LMAO" meant launching missiles at orphanages. Well, I LMAOed. I don't think they are ever gonna see their parents again.
Mommy, Mommy! Are we werewolves?
Shut up and comb your face.
Emo kids are so good at kicking football. I hear they have good hang time.