Ares jokes

Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.

Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.

Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.

What do you get when the queen farts a noble gas?

What do you get when a dino farts? A blast from the past.

Why are ninja farts so dangerous? They are silent but deadly.

My dad asked, "Where are you going?"

Me: "Back to the orphanage."

What does "A" say to "ss"?

"We are the perfect couple. We make Ass."

Roses are red, violets are blue, Old man Jeffrey touches the youth.

Roses are red, violets are blue, it's really no wonder your mama left you!

I once went up to an orphan and they were crying, and I asked where their parents are, and they started crying more.

What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?

They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.

I don't give two shits about how evil these are. They're funny.

What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They are both meat substitutes.

Why are New Yorkers so good at reading?

Some of them went through 100 stories in 10 seconds.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, Ur dad bought you.

What's the difference between a submarine and Madeline McCann?

They are both full of seamen and at the bottom of the sea.

I love making jokes about orphans!

What are they going to do, tell their parents?

What do black men in the NBA like about going to the locker room after they are done playing basketball?

Receiving golden showers from other black teammates.

If you’re bored, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Your hairline jokes are so bad that they make me want to rip all my hair out.

A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."

Sorry.

Why are you sorry?

Sorry for putting deez nuts in your mouth.

Like if you are emo.