Ares jokes
Q: Why are medication pills white?
A: Because they work.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"
A woman having labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
“Don’t worry,” said Doc to the worried husband.
“Those are just contractions.”
What’s the difference between outlaws and orphans?
At least outlaws are wanted.
"we are not the same"🖕🗿🖕
What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?
One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.
What are the similarities of GTA V and 9/11? A plane can be stolen and crashed into a building by a bunch of terrorists.
Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?
Because they are really committed to their cause.
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
What is Mexicans' favorite sport?
Cross-country.
World leaders are so old, they've got nostalgia for the Cambrian explosion.
I wonder if any of these people are still alive.
Anyways,
When I arrived at the pearly gates when I died, the guardian asked me how I died. I told him I was just hanging around.
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
There are perks to bringing an emo to the grocery store; you can get coupons by scanning their wrist.
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."
-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
The world has turned upside down. Orphans are now being homeschooled.
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
Why are you wearing a cap? Oh, I know, to cover your hairline!