Ares jokes
Friends are like penguins: if you stab them, they die. 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
JFK: Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.
Hey Abygail ;) can we talk? I just wanna say that you prob are sexy :)
If you think about it, then adoption is the last choice for getting a child, so those who are adopted were the last choice.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
Orphans and punching bags are almost the same.
They both get hit, but a punching bag is still wanted.
Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son. Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day. 😐
What do your underwear and the Starship Enterprise have in common?
They are both concerned about “Klingons near your anus”.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"
Saying I'm sorry and I apologize are basically the same thing... except at a funeral.
Yo mama's feet are so fat, she had to wear a sock on each toe.
I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words. They wanted to hear them. They are: "you still holding the ladder?"
John F. Kennedy: "Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head."
Hey D.K., how are you? :)
Love you!
Why are Americans bad at chess? Because they lost two towers.
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.
I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"