Appearance jokes

Your hairline is like Quandel Dingle, it's so goofy!

A telescope has two uses:

1. To look in space. 2. To see your hairline.

Your hairline goes so far back that it had dinner with Jesus.

You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"

Are you twinning today? Because The Rock would be shocked!

Girl, you are so ugly that when you look in the mirror, it shatters, more than your relationship.

Your hairline is so jacked up even the barber couldn't fix it.

You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

I'd give you a nasty look, but you've already got one.

Your hairline is so big it took your mom a map to find it.

Sydney Drake is hot. ⛓🖤🥺😩

Yo mama so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?

"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."

I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.

Cremation is my only hope for a hot, smoking body.

Your hairline looks like the Batman symbol.

Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!

I took a plane to go see my hairline.

Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"

Your hairline is so far back I need binoculars to see it!