Appearance jokes

Your forehead is so big, I thought you were Megamind for a second there.

You look like a burger.

Yo mama so ugly, Bloody Mary handed her an application through the mirror.

What do you call a fat fortune teller? A four-chin teller.

So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!

Luigi was dying and had two sons. Bruno was handsome, but Alberto was ugly.

He said, "Maria, tell me, is Alberto my son?"

"Yes, Luigi," his wife said, and he died happily.

Wife said, "Thank God he didn’t ask about the other one!"

So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.

I am a fat girl.

Your forehead is so big you could land a plane on it.

Yo forehead so big it makes Megamind's forehead small.

When someone calls you gay, say:

"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"

Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in a mirror, it says, "Viewer discretion advised!"

Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.

When you look in the mirror, the mirror cracks.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You are so ugly, Do not tell me that is really you.

How do you check that a rabbit is old?

You check how many gray hares it has.

Your hairline is running away faster than when your dad went to get milk, and that’s saying something.

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked at me surprised.

(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)

Girls with the name Zoe have big foreheads.

Your hairline is so far back that it goes all the way across the globe.