Appearance jokes
The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.
So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"
Ah yes, cremation. My last chance of having a smokin' hot body.
Me: "You wanna see my dad?"
Some kid: "Yeah?"
Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."
Some kid: "He ain't appearing."
Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."
*The kid laughs*
Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃
Your face was so ugly, you got adopted by a poop!
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
If someone called you ugly, say before you call me ugly, look in a mirror.
Boy: Hey! I love you...
Girl: Eww, you are so ugly.
*boy sent a pic of his dic*
Girl: Beauty doesn't matter in love.
There are two types of faces:
The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.
Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.
Why is James ugly? Cuz he do be a nerd with braces.
Why does Job have an Area 51 head? Because his head is the shape of a 🦖.
Jobs,
50 shapes head.
Helicopters fly because they are so ugly that the ground pushes them away.
Your reflection.
I apologise for this joke lmfaooo, and you have probably heard this banger before, anyways;
What is the difference between a priest and a zit? 👀 The zit waits till you are 13 to come on your face 🤧
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?
Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
Your hairline is so far back that it goes all the way across the globe.
I wasn't staring at you; I was trying to figure out if that's your forehead or the moon.
Your forehead is so big, I thought you were Megamind for a second there.
You're so ugly you scared the crap out of the toilet!