A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up, and the teacher was surprised. She didn’t think anyone would stand up, so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?” He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.”
Did anyone ever notice that "STUDYING" is a mixture of studying and dying?
Tiktoker: I will kill anyone who pours milk before cereal.
Depressed kid tiktok reply: *pours milk before cereal, pours cereal then takes a bite* I'll wait.
If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.
Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked?
If anyone's joke here says "burn in hell," I will mimic your account for the rest of your life.
Anyone can do a Michael Jackson impression all you need is a small boy who can keep a secret.
The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."
The students said, "Oof, that is sad."
The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"
The students said, "Your parents."
The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.
Anyone know about the war? It's not Russia we should hate, it's Putin that we should. 🙄🤪💅
As a fellow emo, I find these very rude and disrespectful. Please take off, or I'll tell Mom.
Also, if anyone knows any high bridges nearby, please tell me (I'm asking for a friend).
P.S. I have no friends.
Anyone who says they don't like cats has never had one cooked right...
I wasn't going to tell another emo joke, but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
Has anyone alive ever died?
Is this our eternal life?
I didn't ask: ❌
I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem that anyone needed this information, and there doesn't seem to be any chance anyone will need this information in the future. ✔️
Random couple after their first night:
Husband: It was very tasty. 🥵
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: Does anyone had taste it before?
Wife: ☠️
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
Why couldn’t anyone see the bird?
Because it was in da skies.
A week before Christmas my wife left me. She said I was too selfish and full of myself and she could not take it anymore.
On Christmas Eve, Santa asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said, "All I want is the one I love more than anyone else in the world."
On Christmas morning I woke up in a box under my Christmas tree.
anyone up for some fortnite?
