what day can you have sex on?
answer: Wednesday why? because its a hump day
what do you call Stephen hawkings on fire? [answer] hot wheeles
Why did the chicken cross the road Answer: to get to his job at KFC
riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. what am I?
answer: a stamp
A blonde walks into the Doctors office. She tells the Doctor, " My boyfriend has dandruff". The Doctor tells her to use Head and Shoulders. She leaves. About an hour later, the Doctors phone rings. He answers, its the Blonde. The Doctor asks how he can help her. " Well Doctor, I understand head, but how do you hove shoulders?"...........
There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have it,but you don't have it because you are poor! The poor child answers:You're right it's very nice but i'have one thing that you don't have! The Rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline and all the other games that can be done outdoors and tells ti the pope child: looks that beautiful swimming pool I have is very big you don't have it because you are poor! and the poor child says: Beautiful is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have. So the rich child feels bad he says: Wait but I'm rich, how is it possible? I have everything i want because I'm rich.Why you have something that I don't have? And the poor child says : I have cancer!
So one day I was walking home from school with my best friend sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that bob the class rep got her pregnant a eight months ago and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said “sally it’ll be ok I’m sure she’ll be happy to get a grandson” “yeah thanks suzy” she said to me then went into her house. The next few weeks she didn’t show up to school so I was like oh she must be in trouble with her mom I’ll go check on her So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands “oh hello. Is that Sally’s son!! Can I see sally?” Her mom says sure and I go inside but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone “here lies sally 2004-2020” so I ask her mom in tears “oh did she not make it through the birth?” And her mom replied “you could say that..”
How do Germans tie their shoes ? Answer: In Nazis !
A priest is struck by lightning and lays hurt on the ground.
When medical crew arrives he denies them saying "God will surely save me."
The medical team tries to help him but he keeps struggling and eventually dies.
Later in the afterlife, he screams at God, saying, "Why didn't you save me? Am I not dear to you?"
God answered, "B**** I sent you a f***ing ambulance and you denied it!"
Why do some people keep posting lame jokes about 9/11?
Answer; Because they are STUPID LOSERS!
Question; What is the BIG ADVANTAGE to going out on a date with a "Homeless Chic"? Answer; After the date, you can "Drop Her Off" ANYWHERE!
What do you call the only Trump Supporter to follow his orders to obstruct justice? Answer: Attorney General William Barr!
Who gets more dick, straight male rap fans or straight male swifties? Answer: Straight male rap fans, because there’s no such thing as a straight male swiftie.
What do rednecks find when they research their family tree?
Answer; Their INCESTors!
You know what's REALLY "Ironic"?
Answer; These REALLY ARE the "Worst Jokes" I've ever heard!
Did you hear that Ted Nugent had a beer thrown at him at one of his shows?
Answer; He was okay. It was a draft so he dodged it easily!
What do you call a Deranged Psychotic Woman with a Stupid Hairdo?
Answer; KERI LAKE!
How do you give a woman from Alabama a Nice Compliment?
Answer; You say to her, "Hey, NICE TOOTH!"
i'm bored so can yall ask me some questions and i have to answer them
