ANS jokes
What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.
What's the difference to a kamikaze and bin Ladin?
Bin Ladin survived when he went into a building. I have aids.
What do you call an iPhone put into a smoothie maker?--An Apple smoothie.
This is an inside joke for my friend Caiden...
"Hey, where’d you get that paint from?" "Ha! Paint!"
I accidentally hit an orphan with my car, but I was not worried because he couldn’t tell his parents.
Memes
There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?
Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.
Dad: She had to take the deep penis.
Son: Umm...... WHAT!?
Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.
Dad: Oh for god's sakes.
Dad: Epi Pen.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."
I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
You know why you never wanna fly with an orphan?
'Cause then they know they won't die alone.
What is an orphan's favorite day?
Tomorrow: that is when the sun will come out.
Which type of nut goes to outer space?
An astro-nut.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Why can't an orphan have a phone?
Because they will see a home.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
If an orphan took a photo, what would it be called?
A self-me.