ANS jokes
How many times do you tickle an octopus to make it laugh?
Ten-tickles.
A guy tells his pal, "My wife is expecting. We're going to the clinic to see if it's a girl or a boy."
"Congrats, man. What are you gonna name it if it's a boy?"
"We're going with Trevor."
"Ok, what if it's a girl?"
"Then we'll have an abortion."
A happy little girl was running on the grass. She saw two gay guys kissing in a blank space, and she started crying. The two gay guys heard her crying, and then they asked her: "Why are you crying?" The little girl answered: "This is the first time I see an unnatural nature."
😂😂😂😂
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.
A penis has a bad life. His neighbor is an asshole, his friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!
The other day my mom called me a retard.
I'm now an orphan.
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
Say "beans" fast three times.
Now you’re an idiot.
Q: What time does an Asian go to the dentist?
A: 2:30
If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan. I mean, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What do you get when you cross an eagle with a lion?
A griffin.
Always practice safe sex: paint an X on the sheep that kick.
Lil Johnny's teacher wanted to play an alphabet game, so she said, "What word starts with A?" Lil Johnny raised his hand fast, but she knew that he would say "ass," so she picked on Sally and she said, "Apple." She said, "What word starts with B?" Little Johnny raised his hand as fast as he could, but she knew that he would say something like "bitch," so she picked on Emmanuel and Emmanuel said, "Banana." She went all the way to W. Little Johnny raises hand as fast as he could again, and the teacher thought of a cuss word that could start with the letter W. She could not think of a cuss word that could start with W, so she called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny said, "Wow." The teacher said, "Good job." Then Little Johnny said, "Like wow, two elephants fucking!"
Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?
Because there is no one to teach them.
What do you call an emo furry squad?
The suicide furs.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by kids.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he doesn't know where home is.
I meant to say, what’s an orphan's least favorite store to go to?
Family Dollar store.