ANS jokes
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
So there's an orphan in a hospital, and the doctor walks up and says, "Sorry, kid, but this is a family hospital."
We need to stop with all the discrimination here! I don’t discriminate! I love all races, even the bad ones, I’m a fan of all genders, even the fake ones, and am a fan of all nationalities, even the alien kinds.
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.
An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf, and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
Picrel is the average wopmutt. Shitalians aren't white, European, or even human.
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
If an emo counts down, don't worry, they probably have only one bullet.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
I have an EpiPen.
My friend gave it to me while he was dying.
It seemed really important to him that I have it.
What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?
Twilight Special.
Having an abortion will make you so tired... it literally sucks the life out of you.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
Satanism is such an ugly word. I prefer the term, "red skin appreciation."
Chiefs is an egg-cellent cook!
Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.
He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.
Q: What is the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?
A: One knows where home is.
What do you call a fat man that has a stomach shaped like an egg?
Humpty Dumpty!
My favorite toast for parties: May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
A man goes to a restaurant and asks for some chili.
The waiter said, "Sorry sir, this is an Asian restaurant."
So he stretches his eyes and says, "Oh herro, can I get some chiri?"