ANS jokes
What's an orphan's selfie called?
A family portrait.
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
What's the difference between a gay guy and an oven?
An oven doesn't fart when you take your meat out.
What show does an orphan hate? Family Feud.
Why is E.T. better than an orphan?
Because he found his way home.
What’s the best part about fucking an emo chick?... she's limited edition.
Little Johnny walks out to the garage and sees Dad smoking a cigarette. He asks, "Hey Dad, can I have a puff of that cigarette?" Dad asks, "Well, Johnny, can your dick reach your ass?" Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, no, Dad, my dick can't reach my ass." His Dad says, "There's your answer, Johnny..." Little Johnny goes back in the house.
About an hour later, Little Johnny comes back out to the garage and sees his Dad drinking a beer. He asks, "Hey Dad, can I have some of that beer?" Dad asks, "Well, Johnny, can your dick reach your ass?" Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, no, Dad, my dick can't reach my ass." His Dad says, "There's your answer, Johnny..." Little Johnny goes back in the house.
About an hour later, Little Johnny comes back out to the garage with a big plate of Tollhouse Chocolate Chip cookies, fresh from the oven. His Dad says, "Wow, Johnny, those sure look like some good cookies. You think I can have some?" Little Johnny asks his Dad, "Well Dad, can your dick reach your ass?" His Dad scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, yes, Johnny, I do believe my dick can reach my ass." Little Johnny says, "Well, Dad, you can go FUCK yourself, cuz Mom made these cookies for me!!!"
Two kids were beating up a kid in an alley, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
I'm in school lol.
My bro’s parents died, but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure, and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days.
What do you call a skeleton with no arms? An un-armed skeleton.
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me.
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
What happens to an Indian's doorbell when you ring it?
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.
What do you call a scared octopus?
An octopussy.
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes.
What's the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ?
One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldn't work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and savior Jesus Christ.
An orphan's first word would be "orphan keeper."
If Jeffy goes to an orphanage, he will die. How is he supposed to move?
What do you call an Asian that was born too early?
Wong Tai Ming.
You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.
Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.