ANS jokes
If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office?
Only one of them is scared.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar of ten dollar bills, so he asks the bartender if it's a jar of tips. The bartender says no, it's for a bet. So the man asks what the bet is and the bartender says, "Well, if you put ten dollars into the jar then knock out the bouncer, next you go outside and remove a rotten tooth out of the rottweiler's mouth, and last you go upstairs and give an orgasm to the fat lady who has never had one. If you can do all those things then you get everything in the jar as well as free drinks for the month." So the guy puts in ten dollars, turns to the guy next to him and knocks him out with one punch. Then the guy continues outside, all you hear for an hour is screaming and whining from the dog. When all is silent, the man walks in and asks, "So where is the fat lady with the tooth?"
There was a cowboy riding in a desert when he saw a little girl up ahead. He heard her crying, so he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her: "Hey, what's going on? Why do you cry? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The Indians came, killed my father and my mother, and raped my sister."
The cowboy just laughed, unlocked his belt, and pulled his trousers down and said, "Guess it isn't your day, is it?"
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times?
He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
Where is an elephant’s penis?
On their feet, because if you get trampled on, you’re fucked.
What is black and white and red all over? An exploding zebra!
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Man, it's hot in here!"
The other muffin says, "OH MY GOSH A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!"
What do you call an orphan taking a family photo?
A selfie.
What does an apple and a gay person have in common?
Both fruits hang in trees out in the Middle East.
So an orphan was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Then said, "Do you want me to get your parents?"
How do you blow up an Indian? Press the red dot in the middle of their forehead!
🤣😂😆😁
A man goes to a doctor and says he's having problems shitting, so the doctor gives him an enema and says he needs to do it a few times at home, but does the first one for him. So the guy bends over the table, lubes him up, and shoves it deep in him, and he yells.
So later, the man goes home and tells his wife he needs her help with the enema. So he bends over, she lubes him up, puts a hand on his shoulder, and she shoves it up there, and he starts screaming and cussing, and the wife asks, "Did I hurt you?" He said, "No, I just realized when the doctor did it, he had both hands on my shoulders."
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.
Whenever you wanna roast an orphan, say "yo mamma".
An Oxymoron: A “Normal Autistic”.
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled, "Hot wheels!"
Would an orphan's family photo be considered a selfie?