ANS jokes
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they can't scream "daddy!"
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.
What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?
The elevator can raise a family.
what do you call an autistic police officer? special forces
An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
What was the ONLY difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apples got picked.
Why did an orphan have s**? To have someone to call daddy.
What is an orphan's favorite store?
Home Depot.
What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?
The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.
If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.
What do you call an animal that knows karate? Moose Lee 😊😁
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What's the best time to hang out with an Indian? When your nose is clogged.
When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"
Mom: You need to grow up. You're so immature.
Me: *glares* Get out of my castle....
Mom: It's a pillow fort.
Me: Why can't I have an imagination! ?
Mom: You're almost 19 years old.
Me: Not good enough... OUT!
What do you call an Irish man that breaks up fights?
Liam Malone.
If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.
What do you call an army of disabled people?
Special forces.