Animal jokes
What's black and red/read all over? A baby skunk with a bad case of diaper rash!
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
What do you call a male cow that snores?
A “Bull Dozer”.
What does the blind man say when walking past the fish market?
“Good evening, ladies.”
Have you ever heard of the stupid coyote? He got stuck in a trap, chewed off three of his legs, and was still stuck!
sending my army to war :)
A farmer had a donkey and a dog. One night, he was getting robbed by a thief. The donkey told the dog to bark, but the dog refused. So the donkey brayed very loudly, and the thief ran out of the house, and the farmer beat up the donkey.
What do you call a pile of cats? A MEOW-tain.
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow who?
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Why don't Chinese people play cricket?
Because they ate all the bats!
When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"
What do you call a monkey in a mine field?
BaBOOM!
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
What is a snake's favorite drug?
Adder-all.
The chicken is so fat.
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
What are cow jokes considered?
Cheesy.