what's black and red/read all over? a baby skunk with a bad case of diaper rash!
Person: Where do I commit suicide?
Dog: Roof.
Person: Good idea.
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
I named my dog Chicken......
I love eating chicken
why did the bat cross the road because to get blood bar
I was going to tell you a joke about a big cat but I would be lion.
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!!
What is a pig’s 🐷 favorite pie 🥧?
Mississippi Mud.
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri day.
a guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if its relephant. he says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
A family had a very disobedient dog. it would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.
I was setting a voice recognition password for my new phone and a dog nearby barked and ran away. Now I'm still looking for that dog to unlock my phone.
One day a cow ate a fish
what came out the other side?
A dead fish.
I love working with animals, especially when I get to hear their cries of help.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Your mom.
Dad goat:Son do you know what i like to eat Son goat:No what? Dad goat: Goat Meat Son goat:*Gasps* Dad goat: Nah i'm just KIDing
What does a cow say when he remembers something?
"I have deja moo!"
What did the cow call its own life? An udder mistake.
what do you call a dog without legs? nothing it won't come either way.
