Animal jokes
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
My fish died, and I didn't do anything. I just took my fish for a walk.
"Kylin milks me all day like I'm a cow."
What do you call a rabbit with a big ass?
A BUNny.
Yooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
I’m becoming a litter bit more zebra everyday.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flat-mate.
What do you call a gangster involved with anime? A Cuz-Player.
What are Africans' favorite game to play? Hungry hippos.
My fish can break dance. Only for 20 seconds and only once.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Ok, wanna hear another one? Okay. Knock knock. (Who's there?) The chicken from the other joke.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
Yo mama so ugly, she has a sign in her garden saying, “Beware of the dog!”
I am whooping my doge's a$$. If you like, you can free him.