Animal jokes
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
What do emos and bats have in common? The both hang.
I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.
Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.
A goose with no beak, and you eat?
Goose beak salad, file! :)
How do you get a million fowl?
You run through Africa with a bullet of water.
Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
My fish died, and I didn't do anything. I just took my fish for a walk.
"Kylin milks me all day like I'm a cow."
What do you call a rabbit with a big ass?
A BUNny.
Yooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
I’m becoming a litter bit more zebra everyday.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flat-mate.
What do you call a gangster involved with anime? A Cuz-Player.