Animal jokes
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
Why can’t fish play basketball?
'Cause they are scared of the net.
Like if your best friend has a dog.
You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
What is a four-legged animal called that can fly?
A donkey flying in the sky running away from me.
Why do cats leave scratches on arms? They don't; I do it myself.
Why did the flamingo cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
Why did the bee go to the doctors?
Answer: Because he had hives.
Where does a cow take his date?
Answer: To the moooooovies!
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.
What's the difference between an orange?
A hippopotamus riding a four-door motorcycle.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
To Cock-A-Doodle Die. Now you have a rooster pancake. My favorite. ^^
Why did the chicken cross the road? To cock-a-doodle die...
Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
What do you call a monkey in a minefield?
A baboom.
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!