What animal should wear a wig?
A bald eagle!
I was talking to a beaver about my life. I don't think he really gave a dam about it at all.
Damn, DIN just went over me and I'm trying to figure out what it is. A camel's dick.
What do you call a short student?
A Ravin.
Hey, did you hear about the cat revolution? It was a cat-astrophy! I guess we just have to stay PAWSitive!
Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
Why are ant colonies very healthy? Because they have lots of antibodies.
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
What's black, white, and "read" all over?
A zebra after a lion is full.
What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?
A hambone.
Why did the bat fall out of the tree?
It couldn’t hang in there.
A goat drank my Red Bull, so now it's a Baphomet!
A bear walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have a grilled . . . cheese?"
The barkeep asks the bear, "What's with the big pause?" The bear says, "Well, I'm a bear."
What did the cheetah tell the other cheetah when they had a test?
"Cheetah, cheetah!"
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A Doberman in a playground.
Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.
The waiter said, "What's that?"
I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt, quack!
"I really hate cats," my friend replied with, "You gotta be kitten me!"
A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?
