Animal jokes

How did Peter Cottontail get his swing on? He made love to Alice in Wonderland.

Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?

It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.

What is a rabbit's favorite drink? Hare wine.

Why would you not let an elephant sleep in the same bed with you?

Because they stink and now the room smells like elephant shit.

Yo, look, they give me and my girl free pizza and a big bottle of rabbit wine. Yay, yay! Don't drink too much of it; you might turn into a wine rabbit.

Where can a male and female rabbit make love at? The rabbit house or the rabbit hole?

A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high, smoking weed, talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage.

And then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor, gets drunk, and asks the rabbit, "Can I have one more scotch, pretty please?"

And the rabbit says, "Hell to the naw, I'm not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath."

Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?

Why did the whale cross the ocean?

To get to the other tide!!! 😂

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef! Hahahahahaha!

What do you call a flying pig?

Fiction.

My joke: You have to guess, answers come at 3:00. Why did the cow jump into space?

Hint... it smelled its favorite food 🍱 and saw its future!

That hint was technically the whole answer. Can you guess in 3 hours? Lol, I will be posting every time, and my giveaway starts at 5:00: my mega fly ride bat dragon 🐉 and five jungle eggs.

Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.

This news: family neuters furry son.

What happens when animals do a squat?

It doesn't become pretty...

What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?

The fish can't go fast.

What's a bison's favorite gun?

A PP Bizon.

Do fish have tits?

Fish tits.

What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?

They get choked.

Why did the squirrel swim on its back?

To keep its nuts dry.

Beach whales.