And jokes

Emo

What do my balls and emos have in common?

...Nothing, they both hang themselves...

Pen

I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

Orphan

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.

Christmas

What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?

They both hang from a tree!

Memes

Language

If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?

An American.

Talent

You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.

Priest

What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?

They can both flash.

Will Smith

If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."

Emo

How many emos does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just sit there and cry in the dark.

Slap

Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.

Emo

What’s the difference between a normal kid and an Emo?

When you feel an Emo's arm, there’s lots of texture! Feels great, too!

Beta

Join my beta communication community committee commission Cumbria, please guys and girls and gurls. It's all inclusive b&b.

Ugliness

What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?

He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.

Pistol

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy.

You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

Emo

What's the difference between emo people and normal people? Normal people have wrists.