What do women and airplanes have in common?
A cockpit.
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because it’s inside a cell!
Why are fish easy to measure?
Because they bring their own scales.
If your left nut was Thanksgiving and your right nut was Christmas, then you wouldn't have any balls because they're holidays.
Skeletons can't play church music, obviously. They got no organs.
What do you call a skeleton with no friends? Bonely.
Technically, we have all been deeper in our mom than our dads have.
A funny joke scenario.
Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.
Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.
Why did the skeleton want a friend? He was feeling bonely.
They say that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. Wanna fight? 👅💦
What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?
Nut in the butt.
I did so much research that I got bone-tired from doing this, tibia honest. You probably didn't find that humerus. I got a skeleton of these puns. I guess I could learn a femur puns. I was wondering if the creators of this site could talus how they come up with puns or maybe give some advice? I'm only 14 years old.
Your forehead is so big, your face is on your chin.
What’s the difference between a bird and a human?
“We don’t eat with our peckers.”
Little Timmy wanted to take a shower with his dad. His dad said, "Don't look down." Timmy looked down. Timmy said, "What's that?" Timmy's dad said, "That's Mr. Wiggles." Timmy wanted to take a shower with his mom. Timmy's mom said, "Don't look down." Timmy looked down. Timmy said, "What's that?" Timmy's mom said, "That's my garden." Timmy's mom said, "Don't look up." Timmy looked up. Timmy said, "What are those?" Timmy's mom said, "Those are her headlights." Timmy wanted to sleep with his parents. His parents said, "Don't look under the covers." Timmy looked under the covers. Timmy yelled, "MOMMY, MOMMY, MR. WIGGLES IS ATTACKING YOUR GARDEN! TURN ON YOUR HEADLIGHTS!"
Get up, you lazybones!
There's something on your chin. No, not that one, the third row.
Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?
A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
Why did the skeleton start a fight? Because he had a bone to pick.
