Anatomy jokes

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?

They are both legless.

Why did I giggle?

Because I saw the ocean's bottom.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.

Why do horny, deaf girls wear tight pants?

So you can read her lips.

I wish I was a toe because I want to be banged all day.

You know I used to call my dogs' balls the Twin Towers, until they came rumbling down.

Why can't the skeleton go to the dance?

Because he has "no body" to go with!

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 10 fingers, the middle ones are for you.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? He didn't have any BODY to go with.

What's the difference between a cactus and a school bus?

On a bus all the little pricks are on the inside.

What does gum in my d*ck have in common?

Both get chewed on by little kids.

What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?

The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!

When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."

A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."

I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.

Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

Skeleton puns? Nah... they aren't that humerus.

Why does the heart listen to music a lot?

Because it loves feeling the beat.

What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."

Why did the skeleton not go to the ball? Because he had no body to go with.