Anatomy jokes

Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.

Why did I giggle?

Because I saw the ocean's bottom.

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?

They are both legless.

What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?

The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!

Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?

What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?

They have both had a few strokes.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? He didn't have any BODY to go with.

What's the difference between a cactus and a school bus?

On a bus all the little pricks are on the inside.

What does gum in my d*ck have in common?

Both get chewed on by little kids.

The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"

He says, "No."

She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."

When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."

A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."

I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.

Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

Skeleton puns? Nah... they aren't that humerus.

Why does the heart listen to music a lot?

Because it loves feeling the beat.

Why did the skeleton not go to the ball? Because he had no body to go with.

Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?

A: Will you marrow me?

What do you call a man with a curly toe?

Carlito.

What did one butt cheek say to the other?

"Together we can stop this shit!"

What did one saggy boob say to the other?

"We better start getting some support around here, or people are gonna think we're nuts!"