Anatomy jokes
What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"
He says, "No."
She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."
What's the difference between a cactus and a school bus?
On a bus all the little pricks are on the inside.
What is the point of buttchins?
To catch flies.
Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?
What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?
The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!
I wish I was a toe because I want to be banged all day.
Why do horny, deaf girls wear tight pants?
So you can read her lips.
Why can't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he has "no body" to go with!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 10 fingers, the middle ones are for you.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? He didn't have any BODY to go with.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
Why did I giggle?
Because I saw the ocean's bottom.
Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.
What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?
They have both had a few strokes.
When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."
A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."
I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.
Skeleton puns? Nah... they aren't that humerus.
Roses are red, just like your lips.
Mountains are big, just like your tits.