Always jokes
My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."
I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.
Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
Why do asses make terrible spies?
Because they always CRACK under pressure.
Memes
Did you get your phone from the desert? No wonder why your texts are always so dry.
It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”
I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
Why do golfers always bring a spare pair of pants?
Because they always get a hole in one!
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
There's a girl I like in my school, but she's always on her phone. It seems that I can't get a SIGNAL from her.
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had mad flow!
Why did the rapper become a construction worker?
Because they were always BUILDING UP their RHYMES!
Why do so many kids love boomerangs? Because they always come back.
Why was the rapper always so confident?
Because he had a lot of rhyme and reason!
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had a PHAT BEAT to keep them in check!
Why don't rappers ever get LOST?
Because they always find their way with their GPS (Great Poetic Skills).
Why don't rappers ever become bankers?
Because they always break the BARS!
Why was the rapper always good at math?
Because he had a lot of FLOW CHARTS.