So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not), and Michael Jackson's song "Billie Jean" sounds like my name, and so my mom says, as the song is playing, "(My name) is not my daughter, she's just a girl who claims that I am her mum." Wow. *applauds for mother* Love you momma =)
Always Jokes
In fields of gold, where sunshine beams, Monkeys swing and play, it's their dreams. Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, Picking cotton with delight.
Their little hands so quick and neat, Plucking the cotton, can't be beat. They chatter and laugh, they dance and play, In the fields all day, they'll stay.
Their tails so long, their ears so big, They're quite the sight, it's quite a gig. They're busy as can be, you see, In the fields of cotton, they're free.
So let us marvel at these little thieves, In the fields of gold, they give and receive. Their antics bring us joy and delight, In the fields of cotton, they're always right.
I was watching T-Series and I thought to myself, "Man, this sucks!" My sister watches James Charles, and he always says, "That's T-Series." So is it him? SUB TO PEWDIEPIE! UNSUB TO T-SERIES! THEY SUCK!
My grandma always told my dad if a bird ever got in your house/truck, someone would die later that exact day.
She found out she had cancer. 11 months later, my grandpa died of a stroke. I hope to see them in heaven. I’d like to meet them. Pls comment good things. I really, really love them, even though I didn’t get to meet them. 😭😭😭
I always talk to my taco before I eat it.
One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!
I am sick and tired of horror movies; it is always the stupid ones that die first. When you see a guy in a dark, bloody coat and a knife, he ain't there to just look at yah run; don't scream, run!
Jesus seemed like he was probably a good guy; healed the sick, fed the hungry, and gave good advice.
Jesus had only one flaw: he was always hanging around.
Why don’t rappers tell secrets?
Because they always end up DROPPING it.
I will always remember my dad's last words...
Oh wait, I never knew them.
My dad always used to beat me, but he never beat cancer.
I despise lumberjacks. They are always barking up the wrong tree, all bark and no bite.
They just need to leaf people alone or stick with something nicer.
Why are apples and orphans the same?
They always get picked on.
Why can’t a tree have sex? They are always tied up.
Why are orphans always at school?
'Cause they can't be homeschooled.
If someone wears black, say, "If you see someone wears black, they always be emo."
What is the difference between an orange and an orphan?
The orphan always gets picked... Oh wait, I meant an orange always gets picked.
What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)
What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.
When I get home from school, I always lay on my floor crying and wishing I was dead.
Why can’t Chinese people play cricket? Cus they always eat the bat.
When it comes to bears, of course they always give bear hugs, well what do you call them when they aren't hugging right?
Just barely hugging you! Lol.
