Always jokes
My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.
Me: So you're gonna leave me again?
I always ask gay people what LGBTQ means, but I never get a straight answer.
Why are corners so hot?
They are always 90 degrees.
Why didn't the opening photo actually have a pic of sex on it? I have always wanted to see porn, too bad I have parents and a school Chromebook.
A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.
I don't usually make 9/11 jokes. They always go down in flames.
My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?
Society is like chess, it's always whites vs blacks.
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid.
Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel.
One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”
Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”
Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
Why are orphans so fond of shadows?
They're the only thing that accompanies them always.
Why can't Mexicans cross the border? They always sneak powder in.
If someone wears black, say, "If you see someone wears black, they always be emo."
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!
What store does an orphan always get kicked out of?
Home Depot.
You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? One is always picked.
Why can't a kid with ADHD shoot a gun?
Their focus is always off.
If you were to drop an emo and a leaf off a tree, who would hit the ground first?
The leaf, because the emo is always hanging.