my mom once ate a full giant cheesecake and we were walking to our flight back home and she had to shat. we were walking to the bathroom and she full on in front of the caroulsel, she had a lump of poo in her pants... true story haha
Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.
They asked JFK Jr. if he wanted to shower before his flight. He said "No, I'll just wash up on shore."
the terrorists lost there landing gear and had to make a crash landing into the closet building becuse religon
Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!
Control tower to Boeing 747, you're clear to land on (said person)'s forehead.
Why did the planes crash into the twin towers ?
Because the cleaner left the landing lights on
Your forehead is so big I could land a jet plane on it.
Q: Why did the islamic chicken cross the road? A: To get to the airport
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
Welcome onboard Sexist Airlines. Everyone, please fasten your seatbelts now as we are switching to a female pilot.
my dad died in 911
but he was the pilot
How do stars die? Usually a overdose on an airport.
Did you know if you give a guy a plane ticket he flys once but if you push him out of plane he flys for the rest of his life
Confucius says, man who walks through airport door sideways with erection, is going to Bangkok.
What has two left legs 🦵 but can’t walk? An airport
What do you call a kid with cancer walking through the airport?
•Terminal
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes. Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building. So he had a much better flying record.
People often ask me what I would do for a klondike bar well I straight up put 5 hijackers on flight 175 before it departed from logan airport at 8:14a.m. on September 11 2001
