Aed jokes
I see my friends at school. They talk to me, they go back to class, but they forgot I am their classmate, and they were like, "You're a dumbie." And I was, "Well, you're a dumbass, bi***!"
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
Imagine if Batman had a family reunion!
MU, I love your joke, but I cut myself a piece of cake, pie, steak, cheesecake, and anything else I can find.
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and a driver’s education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
You look like a heroin addict in a women's refuge.
Why can’t USA and England play chess?
The USA has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.
Why do orphans miss Mother’s Day? Because they don’t have a mother to give to!
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
Why does Mini P.E.K.K.A. love pancakes? Because he is busy watching explicit content involving the Archers and Firecracker.
What do Rubik's cubes and melons have in common?
They have a history of separating colors.
I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."
Your hairline is like the McDonald's logo. It's forming a perfect M.
If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.
I held on to my money stronger than an orphan holds on to a teddy bear on Father's Day.
Q. What's an Alzheimer's victim's favourite song? A. Stand Down at Sundown.
Yo Mama is so dumb, she stares at a juice carton for an eternity because it says "Concentrate" on the box.
Girl: "Daddy!"
Father: "Do I love you?"
Girl: "I'm a... a girl!"
Father: "Mhm!"
Woman: "Daddy?"
Father: "Of course?"
Woman: "I'm a girl too!"
Father: "Does God love children?"
Boy: "Yessss..."