Aed jokes
Don't make a person look a fool when you are the real one!
Just watched an upsetting video. Please retweet. #Stop The Make-A-Wish Foundation.
How do you get 50 babies into a car?
You blend them.
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
Last night I slipped on a banana.
My friend said it was a-peeling!
Why did the dog cross the road?
It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
Here's a good tree joke to spruce up your day!
Yo mama so stupid, she went to the Super Bowl with a spoon!
I searched up hornets and then said that it will leave a sting.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it, and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Q: What do you call a tsunami?
A: Your mom's water breaking.
When you were born your mother said, "Oh, what a treasure!" Your father said, "Yeah, let’s go bury it."
A burrito walked off a building.
Why doesn't the witch wear panties?
To get a better grip on her broom stick!
Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
What do you call frozen web?
A web-cicle.
I was trying to make a joke about fighting, but I couldn't come up with a good punchline.