Aed jokes
Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Kid 2: Why?
Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.
Why didn't the octopus get a tent? Because it had tentacles.
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana?
Tiger Woods had a good driver.
Why did the polack try writing a letter with his dick?
Because he didn't have a pen to write with.
I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.
What can a gay man not be, but a heterosexual female that is a whore can be if a heterosexual male gives her enough money? 💸
cock teaser
So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?
I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"
Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?
But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!
Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.
Your hairline is so far back that when I wrote it on a chalkboard, it did not erase.
Why did the orphan die?
He killed himself because the lack of a support system made him depressed.
A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.
His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.
Why did I beat up the orphan? Because he was a whiny bitch who wouldn't shut the fuck up.
A man ate a bee to mechanical sexting, but he was to be, uh, sex. Bee vagina penis, he want sex but [is] dumb.
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!
Why do black men have nightmares?
Because the only one that had a dream got shot.
How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace?
Give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.
Why does Michael Jackson wear a white glove?
So he won't bite his fingers when he eats a tootsie roll.
Why can’t Hitler do track?
He can’t even finish a race.
(This is a fucked up pick up line). Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11.