Aed jokes
How do you find a rapper in a snowstorm?
Look for the one with the "ICE-COLD RHYMES."
Q: What's the most popular dish in Africa?
A: The empty one!
Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?
A. May your baby rest in pieces.
I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.
A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.
Me: *reading a sign* "Children are a gift from god."
Me: "No, they are a gift from the underworld."
Mother: "Yeah, I picked you up at the gift shop on my way out."
Mother: "You are a spawn of Satan."
Why did the rapper become a painter?
To brush up on his rhymes!
Why did the rapper become a weatherman?
To predict the HEAT of his next single.
Why did the rapper become a carpenter?
To build some SOLID BARS.
They say birds of a feather flock together, so I guess that’s why Kris and common sense haven’t met yet.
Kris looks like a Neanderthal. The only difference is that Neanderthals serve a purpose in HUMAN HISTORY.
If I had a dollar for every brain cell LEO has, I’d have one dollar.
BlessedBrian’s mom’s birth certificate is a COLLECTOR’S ITEM.
BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a joke every day of the year.
I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job.
Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.
My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"
I met a fat chick at the beach.
People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?
I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.
Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"