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Actor

Actor jokes

I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.

It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.

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    • Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?

    Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.

    Actor 1: "I'm Michael with a b and I hate insects."

    Actor 2: "Where's the b?"

    Actor 1: "THERE'S A BEE???????????!!!!!!!!!!!????????!!!!!"

    Q: Why did the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz win an award?

    A: Because he was outstanding in his field.

    Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.

    Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.

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    • Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.

    Actor: Really? What do I do?

    Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)

    Why do they tell actors to "break a leg"?

    Because every play has a cast.

    Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.

    I'm making a new movie, it's called "Veggie Tales." My star actor is Stephen Hawking.

    If Adolf starred in the Room, his most iconic line would be “I did not Hitler! I did not!”