Actor

Actor Jokes

Thor

Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?

Paul Walker

I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.

He had a change of race tho when he died.

Hairline

Your hairline pushed too far back.

Lookin' like it got slapped up by Will Smith :D

Hairline

Your hairline goes so far back it looks like it got slapped back by Will Smith.

Dandruff

Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.

Knife

Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.

Mom: Witherspoon.

Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!

Male

What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?

"I love eating cat."

Man

Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!

Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!

Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!

Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!

What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”

How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!

What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!

What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!

Orphan

What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?

An orphan has all their teeth intact.

Orphan

I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.

Man

Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?

He grew up a Florida Man, after all.