Absence jokes
Why don't orphans go home at pickup?
Because they don't have parents to pick them up.
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
What do you call an orphan who takes a selfie?
A family portrait!
What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.
My dad was a master of art. He was compared to Houdini due to his skill of disappearing.
Why can't orphans have gay sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.
No, they will be wondering what I look like.
What do orphans, parents, and Nemo have in common?
Neither can be found.
Me talks to an orphan: Hey, I have a joke.
Orphan: Go on then.
Me: Your family tree.
What does Nemo have in common with my dad?
They both can't be found.
What’s 1+1?? The number of parents orphans don’t have!
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."
Why did your father go away?
'Cause he needs da milk.
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
The "f" in orphan stands for family.
Except there is no "f."
I would make a dad joke, but I don't have a dad to joke about.
Why can't orphans do it?
They have no one to call "daddy."