Absence jokes
I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"
Why can't an orphan eat a bag of chips?
Because the chip was family size.
What does the M and D in "orphan" stand for?
"Mum" and "Dad."
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
What do you call an orphan's family region?
Me time.
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
I saw a kid on the side of the road covered in rags and asked if he was an orphan. He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orphan.
Orphan who?
Orphan who needs a parent!
Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."
I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."
Why could the orphan never be gay?
Because he had nobody to call "daddy."
Why do orphans have cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a selfie taken by an orphan?
A family portrait.
Why was the orphan so famous?
Because when they asked him go big or go home, he only had one option.
Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅
What's an orphan's least favorite game?
Hide and seek.
Why don't orphans go home at pickup?
Because they don't have parents to pick them up.