Worst Jokes Ever
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!
Q: What's the best part about gardening?
A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
Why didn't Hitler's girlfriend like giving him a blowjob? It left a Nazi taste in her mouth...
Pedophile: You dropped your candy.
Girl: Thanks!
Pedophile stares as she slowly bends over to pick up her candy.
Pedophile: It looks a bit dirty, do you wanna come back to my house and get a new one?
Girl: How far is your house?
Pedophile: It's that white one right over there.
Girl: You mean that van next to a dumpster?
Pedophile: Yep, it's that one.
Girl:.... Sure! :P
Audience:.........Dumbass girl.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
What's the best part about plowing your cousin?
- It makes your sister jealous.
Did you know that towels are the leading cause of dry skin?
I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.
I was walking down the street one day and I passed the gun store. I walked in and everything was half off. I didn't know back to school sales had started already.
What does a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell it, but they can’t eat it.
What do Chinese parents hate the most?
A newborn daughter...
There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: It picks cotton.
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message
Why did Trump decide to build the wall?
Because China built a wall and they do not have any Mexicans.
If you’re waiting for the waiter at a restaurant, aren’t you the waiter?
How do you know that the U.S. sucks at chess?
They lost two towers.
Why do priests appreciate educated children?
They don't spit.
What does a priest hold on to when having sex?
He holds on to the schoolbag.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
One screams when I peel its skin off.