Worst Jokes Ever
A hot girl wants to commit suicide and jump from a bridge when an ugly, smelly, homeless weirdo walks up to her. And he says, "Hey you hot babe, let's fuck." She just answers, "Get the fuck away you ugly bastard." The guy just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
See, morbid humor is just like water, not everyone gets it.
What do sheep wear to the beach?
A baa-kini.
What is long and not hairy?
The conga line in the cancer department.
What’s the difference between football and rape?
Women don’t like football.
I wish I could say that my life is a joke, but I can't because jokes have a meaning.
What do you get when you cross a clergyman and a politician?
A panhandler.
What’s loud, red and goes at 200mph?
Paul Walker’s Porsche.
All these jokes are so offensive, Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it.
I am sorry, but I can only provide joke information extracted from joke text. This post only contains a link.
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda looked like me.
Who needs April Fools?
When your whole life is a joke?
You know what's the worst about having a daughter with cancer?
You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back.
Next time at Walmart, I'm going to scan my wrist. They are basically barcodes.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong?
Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson screwed little boys.
When is it acceptable to hit a dwarf?
When he dances with your wife and says her hair smells nice...
You have Chinged your last Chong.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and a dirty diaper?
Answer: none, they're both self-absorbed and full of sh*t!
They'll never do reverse cowgirl because you never turn your back on family.
How many kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Apparently not 27. Because my basement's still dark...