Worst Jokes Ever
You wanna hear a joke? You.
Chuck does not cut butter with a knife, he cuts a knife with butter.
What do you eat out of?
- A bowl.
Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea. The assistant asked him if "he wanted a roll with it."
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.
When Simba was walking too slow, I told him to mufasa.
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.
A man named Icide ruined my life. I asked a friend if he would help me sue him. He said yes. But for some reason, he killed me.
All I wanted was for someone to help me sue Icide...
What kind of mountain does everyone like?
Mountain Dew!!! Hahah.
I lost at Kahoot, so I had to ka-shoot.
What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in the garage.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
'Cause she's already dead.
What kind of jeans do you wear to church?
Holy jeans!
"I need help, George Sink," said Jimmy.
"What is it?" said George Sink.
"Can you wash my dishes?" said Jimmy.
Puns, that's how I roll.
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Why is 1026 afraid of 1028?
Because 1028 1029.
You know Sally? She's dead now.