Worst Jokes Ever
What do classical musicians do when they die?
They decompose.
What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Odo walks down the alley and turns into a bar.
How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram.
I told a chemist a joke.
No reaction.
What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?
It got pissed off.
Confucius say, man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
Because from a distance, they looked like hare.
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.
Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?
An escapea.
Why doesn't Jesus buy beer?
Hebrews.
How did Jesus like his chicken?
Crucifried.
The patient says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say."
The doctor says, "Next, please."
Jokes about menstruation are not funny. Period.
Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?
Because its head is so far away from its body.
What is a pirate's favorite element?
Argon.
What did the beach say as the tide came in?
Long time, no sea.