Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.
When someone pops up in your life making you all happy, you be like, "Who sent you?"
The exam is knocking at my door... so I ran away from the window.
A kid got a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. He was still unhappy.
Why?
The kid had no legs.
What has a head and tail but no legs?
A penny.
Kill yourself, hoes!
What is the same with a duck and a bicycle? The handlebars--oh, except for the duck.
Robert Ryall
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe.
How do you punish Helen Keller? You stick a toilet plunger in the toilet.
Why can't Helen Keller have kids? It went up too far.
Your mum!
Hurricane Irma, it blows.
Why do babies cry? Cuz they can't suck very well.
Q: Have you ever felt a window?
A: Did you feel the pane?
Want to hear a joke?
My life. Get it?
My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.
My friend wanted to say egg puns, so I told him, "Omelette you do your egg jokes."
Wanna hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy.
An infinite amount of mathematicians walked into a bar. The first ordered a pint, the second ordered a half pint, the third ordered a fourth-pint, etc. The Bartender eventually walked up and gave them two pints and said: "You mathematicians don't know your limits."
Mrs. Duncan knows where you live. She lives there too. In your basement... lolololololololololololololololololol