Worst Jokes Ever
What do bananas wear into battle?
Banana-rama!
What did the angler say to his students at the end of his fishing class?
Catch you later!
What do you call a duck with no head?
Your mom gay.
How do you punch 40 kids in the face at once? Hit them with a “Sandy Hook”.
Sub to Pwediepie!
My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone, but I passed him a calculator. He couldn't tell the difference.
Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped his head.
The momma called the doctor and the doctor said,
"Why the heck were my children jumping on a bed?"
"Knife to meet you all!"
Stephen's not dead; his WiFi is slow.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
Why is the bald eagle bald?
Because it has no hair.
It has feathers. LOL.
Your mom is so old, she turned to dust before Thanos snapped.
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. A woman asked me to check her balance on the cliff, so I pushed her over because I lost my balance!
What Kind of Hardware store can't orphans go into?
Home Depot.
Why did the little boy cry?
He had a frog nailed to his face and stapled to each of his fins. The frogs were his personal molesters.
My dad was on a hotdog with ketchup.
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)
I remember my mom's last words before her divorce, "Did you just load in me?"
Did you hear that story "Three Lines in the Sand?" By dickadraggin'.