Worst Jokes Ever
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"
Why is the iPhone X best for orphans?
There is no home button.
Wish jokers.
People might not laugh at my jokes, or have a reaction at all, but I'd explode with euphoria.
Periodically, people might laugh every now and then.
Knock knock.
Jou is there?
Why don't you speak English?
A dog talks to another dog and says,
"Wow, you're a hot dog!"
Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom, and they bought pads.
The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no, and her mom fainted!
On a hot summer's day, a famous celebrity tweeted, "It is a beautiful day, and I'm deciding which kid to have fun with today." To which the local priest replied, "I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today."
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman.
This is not a joke. This is not a joke.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Dress up as the altar boy.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
Why can't I drink tea??
Because I laugh too much. TEEEEEHEHEEE
Never drink tea in school... I give people tea if they've passed out... tea can be nice, but only have it once a day... It's not what you think... It's not tea, it's CPR.
Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.
I recently got kicked out of a casino because I apparently misunderstood what the craps table was for.
Where in hell is Lee Harvey Oswald now when we need him?
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
I like my boo like I like my packages: straight out of the box.