Worst Jokes Ever
Uranus has a lot of poop. Yeah. That is my joke.
How do you blow up an Indian? Press the red dot in the middle of their forehead!
🤣😂😆😁
Here’s a joke, go look in a mirror.
You get a deep voice, you shit talk to 5 year olds.
When a guy falls, it hurts them there. When a woman falls, it hurts more.
A kid is trick-or-treating. He knocks on a door. Then someone opens the door and the kid said, "HI, I'M THE WICKED WIENER!"
My girlfriend broke up with me this morning, and we just started dating yesterday.
Now she's having a breakfast.
What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?
A walkie-Torquay.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.
There was once a genie with a 10 foot weenie, and he showed it to the neighbors next door.
They thought it was a snake and hit it with a rake. Now it's only 6.4ft.
If O2 is H2O, what is F?
It is H2O too; F is water as well.
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
What's the one thing me and the New Year's ball have in common?
It's not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this New Year's.
God- make a grumpy old man president.
Angel- why?
G- cause I said so-name him Trump.
A- okay.
G- make him not pay taxes.
A- okay...
Fast forward to 2020
G- you know that grumpy old man?
A- yea...
G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.
A- Krona.
G- exactly.
A- why do you hate humans so much?
G- because I can.
My girlfriend is like treasure to me.
You need a shovel to find her.
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
The chicken!
Yo mama so fat, she broke the stairs to heaven.
I always press the stop button to see you.
What did the rope say to my depressed ass?
~ Hey, you wanna hang?