Worst Jokes Ever
What person can't work at a family business? An orphan.
I still remember my grandpa's last words.
"Stop shaking the damn ladder!"
Mother got shot, damn.
Father got shot, damn.
Sister got shot, damn.
Brother got shot, damn.
Auntie running away with a shotgun!
People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.
Billy and Bobby were walking to school one day. Billy pulled out an mp3 player.
"What's that?" Bobby inquired.
"Oh, just something to zone out the other kids," Billy responded.
The next day, Billy and Bobby were walking to school. Billy rummaged through his backpack and pulled out an mp4 player this time.
"Woah! What's that?" Bobby inquired.
"Oh, just a lil something to shut out the annoying kids at school," Billy responded.
The next day, Bobby noticed Billy's backpack was particularly heavy looking. Billy rummaged through his backpack just outside the school and pulled out an mp5 rifle.
"Holy shit, dude! What the fuck is that for?" Bobby gasped.
"Nice huh? This'll shut those fuckers up for good!" Billy replied.
People: You're ugly.
Me: Ok.
People: I hate you.
Me: Cool, IDC.
People: You're annoying.
Me: Good for me.
People: BTS is dumb.
Me: I'll give you 5 seconds to run!
Women suck (GET IT?!)
A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common?
They both hang from the tree.
Why was the dog stealing shingles?
He wanted to be a woofer.
I feel weird to ask this, but can anyone guess my real name?
#Imbored
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
I don't know, I have both!
I only have sex with suicidal bitches because that pussy [is] limited edition.
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈
Alya?
I nailed my sister's... picture on the wall.
You dirty-minded bastard!
A boy walks into class with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."
Another boy walks in with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."
Then a girl walks in, and the teacher says, "And where on earth have you been?" The girl says, "Well, you see..." Then the teacher stops her and says, "Let me guess, on a peach hill?" The girl says, "No, on 2 big cucumbers."
Once I said to an orphan, "What the 'F' means in 'orphan'?"
He replied, "There's no 'F'."
Me: "There's no family."
When you get a pop-up book of the Qur'an and it just explodes as soon as you turn the page XD.
Why did the Italian American Roman Catholic priest perform fellatio on gay men at the glory hole inside the adult bookstore?
Someone asked him what would he do for a Klondike Bar?