Worst Jokes Ever
Me: I want a PS5.
Dad: Alright, I will say no.
I went up to the depressed kid and said, "I like ya cuts G!"
What is Armin Meiwes' ideal date? Dinner.
Just cut my thumb open with a knife (not a joke).
How come I have a father but not a dad?
He was a priest.
Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?
Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.
Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.
What is brown and sticky?
The leftovers of the iceberg.
What begins in F and ends in UCK?
Fire truck.
One time I tried running to home, but I forgot I don't have one, so I stayed at third.
I saw a guy beat his girlfriend to a pulp after his girlfriend threw a phone in his face. I offered to call an ambulance, but he said he was fine.
I saw an orphan crying the other day, so I asked, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage :)
Ok, there has to be SOMEONE on this website right now. Whoever that is, wanna chat? (I'm just bored)
Why can't orphans tell jokes?
They have no one to tell them to, people.
Why does Sophia have no ears? Her mom gave her, her first haircut.
Penalties. Tap ins. Ghosting. Diving.
Long ago, the four lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Germans attacked. Only Penaldo, master of all four elements, could stop them, but when his country needed him most, he vanished.
MISSING!!
MISSING!!
Name: Ghostiano Penaldo
Missing: 27/6/2021 vs Belgium
Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty".
Last found - Practicing tap ins.
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, Parma, Crotone.
Might be dangerous towards good players.
MISSING!! MISSING!! ⚠️⚠️
Name: Kylian Fraudbappe Missing: 28/6/2021 vs Switzerland Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty".
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, Parc des Princes, Paris.
Last seen: Manuel Akanji’s back pocket.
If orphans made phones, it wouldn't have a home button.
Guys, this is not funny. Stop.
I saw an orphan and asked them if they had parent permission.