Worst Jokes Ever
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.
My hair goes just onto my collar bones. WOW! That's longer than I'll live.
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
Why can you hit orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who are you? Are you an owl or something?
I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.
What goes inside and comes out wet?
What did the fat guy say to the tree?
"Get me some coconuts!"
What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?
"They forgot the stuffing!"
It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.
He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.
Why did orphans want to commit a crime?
Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?
Q: What gun does Africa not have?
A: Water gun.
Your hairline is gone because you never bathed or brushed.
Your mum's hairline was so long that you decided to get therapy.
Your dad's hairline was so long that he died.
Your hairline was so fat that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.
Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the ocean, the whales said, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"