What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a selfie that an orphan takes?
A family picture.
What do you call a cow that can't milk?
A failure!
Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!
Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.
Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?
Your face looks like my butt, but it looks like you.
Your butt is bigger than my ex-girlfriend's butt, and I love it!
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
Q: When a chip gets popped, what happens to it?
A: It gets pooped out of the bag.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so they can fetch some pee. Jack fell down and broke his whole body. Jill just laughed and didn’t care, so now they have a daughter.
Your forehead is so big that your name is Humpty Dumpty, the big forehead!
What’s red and goes 90 miles an hour?
Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
I bet your hairline goes inside your private part, and your girlfriend can’t even touch it.
In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Midixadrupin, Midixarizin or Dixafix.
Papyrus: Sans! I heard that a HUMAN has fallen!
Sans: And you gotta bone to pick with 'em?
I found this game, it's like flappy bird: https://terrorist.group/
I always ask gay people what LGBTQ means, but I never get a straight answer.
We were versing year 8 at footy, and they were mostly black, so I told my white friend to WATCH OUT!!!
What flour do orphans use?
Self-raising flour.
