My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don't even care!
Worst Jokes Ever
Yo, your hairline looks like the letter “O”.
Your mama is so ugly, when she went to the circus they thought she was Pennywise, Mom.
That’s why the nickname for your hairline is the Red Sea.
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
I will always remember my grandma's last words: "What are you doing with that pillow?"
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
I went home to my girlfriend with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"
Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"
What do you call Joey in a room? Transgender.
Today I feel Qatari. Today I feel Arab. Today I feel African. Today I feel gay. Today I feel disabled. Today I feel a migrant worker.
A man marries a blonde chick, lives a happy life together, and the man asks his wife if she wants kids. She says "yes".
So, a couple of years go by, and they have one boy and one girl. They go to school, go home with their report cards, and the dad asks what their grades were. The son says he's not doing well, same with the daughter. They ask why they're doing so bad in school, and the dad replies with "ask your mother that question!"
What language do Gays speak?
HOMOGRAPHY maybe...
Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
How did the rape victim on a diet lose 21 grams?
She died.
Your hairline goes back to when Jeff Bezos had hair.
What is a Karen called in Europe?
An American.
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?
Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.
How do you help a rape victim on a diet lose 7 pounds?
Kill her afterwards.
