50 Jokes

What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?

..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between 9 year old bun

Son:mom can i borrow 50$?

Mom:What NO WAY what do you think money grows on trees?

SOn:mom what is money made of

Mom:paper

Son:where does paper come from?

Mom: . . .

What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.

You watch 50 shades of gray, and you turn gray in bed.

Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws? American: Self defense. Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?

In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last

John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather. Chloe says "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic" John says "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler"

What did 50 do when he was hungry?

My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”

What is an orphans favorat movie. Hint not home alone. Its actually bat man cuz they are 50% the same as him

I was walking down the street when I saw this dude just viben, he was telling ever guy that walked by if his dick was bigger then theirs they have to give him 50 bucks long story short I walked away with 100 bucks that day

what concert only costs 45 cents? 50 cents featuring nickleback

Why can't orphans really play baseball?

Because when they do all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.

An old man goes to a church, and is making a confession: Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18 year old." Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?" Man: "I never have, I am Jewish." Father: "Then why are telling me all this?" Man: "I’m telling everybody!"