50 Jokes

What concert costs 45 cents? -- 50 Cent feat. Nickelback.

Me and my friend were roasting each other. She said, "You look like a Reese's cup." I replied, "You're so old, your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray."

What do most 50-year-old men put inside there cars

Children

Did you know that McDonalds made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50 year old piece of meat in a 12 year old bun.

Person: 'Doctor, doctor I've only got 50 seconds to live'

Doctor: 'Just give me a minute'

First of all, If a Woman Sue's Bill Cosby for Drugging & Rape 50 Years ago, & She Could still remember it, IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN ALL BAD

Jack and Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter, Jill came down with $2.50 that fuckin whore

What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?

..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between 9 year old bun

John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather. Chloe says "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic" John says "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler"

In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.

In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last

What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.

Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws? American: Self defense. Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?

a blond, a red head, and brunette, were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”

What is an orphans favorat movie. Hint not home alone. Its actually bat man cuz they are 50% the same as him

I was walking down the street when I saw this dude just viben, he was telling ever guy that walked by if his dick was bigger then theirs they have to give him 50 bucks long story short I walked away with 100 bucks that day